1. Teach Them to be Strong:
Strength, is a representation of health. Physical strength, emotional strength, Psychological strength and mental strength makes a Whole man. Teach your sons to exhibit strength and resilience in all aspect of life. They should be made to understand that life is answerable to those who exhibit strength.
You can apply these simple tips:
1. Instruct them to pick objects that are a little heavy for them, they feel confident and strong if for the first time they are able to do it. Don't always say "you can't", "don't do it", "it's too big for you", it weakness their confidence.
2. Make them engage in mental exercises like spelling difficult words, solving difficult mathematical problems, memorizing words or stories, writing short articles and some mind drilling exercises, it makes them to be mentally strong.
3. Make them to understand that things will not always go their way, let them understand they may be offended or misunderstood, that they may feel heartbroken sometimes, that they may feel frustrated sometimes too and in all they must learn to express emotional strength and positive behavior, you can do this by intentionally withholding privileges' sometimes, this gives them emotional strength.
2. Teach Them to be hardworking:
There is a popular saying in Nigeria, it goes "No food for Lazy man". This is to say, you must have to work for anything legitimate you want to have, legitimately.
We live in a society where you can't live on others or pest on others, you need to make provision for yourself by working with your hands ( this is to say I don't give recognition to fraudulent or illegitimate means). It is a fact that a lazy boy will make an idle, lazy and irresponsible man, I am very certain nobody wishes that for his/her son, make them do little things like:
1. Make their beds
2. Wash their clothes for older kids
3. Sweep the house sometimes
4. Get water from the tap
5. Mow the lawn for older kids
6. Read a book
7. Serve a meal
8. Run errands, not too far from the house
These can make them get used to the act of working with their hands.
3. Teach Them to Love:
Love is one thing the world needs to be a better, with love we can make great
impact and change our world.
“ If coal can turn to diamond and sand into pot,
if a worm can turn into a butterfly then Love can turn the world”.
They should learn to Love unconditionally, without expecting
something in return, this should start from home, the home can influence Kids to love unconditionally, if they are taught to:
1. Share what they have, share a toy, a gift, a shoe, a phone, anything.
2. Not think about just themselves but consider others in
whatsoever they do in their everyday lives.
I can recall from my earlier days
while growing up, my mum would serve a meal to all of us, we
were made to eat together, share pieces of meat together, of course we fought over the meal sometimes but it bred in us a lifestyle of sharing the
very little we have with others and we still do.
3. One of the sure way children learn to love is by watching
parents express this Love.
I learnt every act of Love I have shown to others
from my Dad, He would go to farm during harvest, harvest some food and give to the neighbors,
his siblings, his mum and the Pastor of our local church, He wasn’t the
wealthiest man but he looked out for others.
When they learn this love from home they naturally take it
out with them everywhere they go, let them know that they can be better than
others, they won’t be bullies at school, they won’t be trouble makers, they
won’t be fighters, they won’t be members of secret cults, they won’t be armed robbers but gentle
men and great Fathers in the future.
Loving everyone unconditionally will make
the world a better place for us and one sure way to spread this Love is to teach
our boys who will become men tomorrow, to love.
4. Teach them To treat women well:
Most of the troubles faced by men, women,
families, the society and even the world at large is a function of the way
young men have learnt to treat women
Families are in crisis because Men have
not been able to effectively relate with women, homes have broken (this is the
biggest contributor in the failure by parents to bring up children who are
morally upright)
Teach your sons never to hit a woman even when the argument
is heated, teach your sons to know that women are to be treated as special kind of humans. They
should learn this while growing up;
1. They should never hit their sisters. As a
Teacher some years back, I can remember telling the kids (Boys) never to hit
another kid especially if it is a girl. They were supposed to protect and help
their female classmates; My Father will punish you not just for fighting your
sisters but for ever raising a hand on them.
2. They should be taught to be
men with self control, all this boils down to the attitudes of parents when
there is a crisis, do you beat up your wife as a man? do you grab your husband
and demand that he beats you as a woman?, what is your attitude when there is
an argument at home? They learn your response to tensed situation at home or in the neighborhood, so be the best example you children can ever have
5. Teach them to be themselves:
They should never be like another person, they are unique beings and must endeavor to be so, nothing more nothing less
6. Teach them to be Responsive:
They should be able to receive and responsible to external influence every time, in every relationship and every conversation. This is best described by the words, expressing themselves. The ability to able express themselves in every situation will save them a lot of trouble, this will also make it easy to be able to monitor them, they company they keep and the relationship they are in. They will talk with you about literally everything.
7. Teach them to be assertive:
In being responsive they should learn that while being responsive they shouldn't be rude but affirmative (truthful or straightforward). We live in a society where people say things like, "I can say anything i choose to say", I can talk to anyone the way I choose to, let them know they can't.
They learn assertiveness by observing older people, especially parents and guidance, this is a call to parents to also learn to be assertive and straightforward
Don't forget to teach them to be Godly:
Teach them to give a place in their life to God except of course you don't believe in God and for me that's fine, let them if you in God that there is a need to for them to know and serve the God that you worship
These are the few things that can make great sons of your boys, you must do all you can to raise responsible young men, this can in turn make the world a better place for all live in
Thank you for taking a step to being a better Parent.
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